The submission ambition that works best for you ...

Did my first gig of the year Thursday last week. Reading to children at an Auckland Libraries, 'Dare to Explore' event, at Three Kings. And what an excellent way to kick things off. It was a warm sunny day. The children were in to it. I was into it. And books were at the heart of it all. Bliss!! :)

I have done no writing over the holiday break. This wasn't the plan but I ended up having a couple of unexpected trips out of Auckland to hang out with family and crikey, where did the time go? Some things are still in limbo too with the Christmas close down and I don't have the heart to move on until I know what's what. Aaand I've been doing a lot of reading (for a variety of reasons, some of which aren't self imposed and can't be put off) and as much as it is crucial to read when you are a writer, it has eaten in to my writing time. It's all grist to the mill though, and when some of the 'reading projects' are over in the next month or two I should be able to slip back into my usual routine. I hope so. I always feel a little lost when I'm not writing. Although I don't think being a little lost is always necessarily a bad thing. It's good to be hungry to write...

I have been thinking more about the 100 rejections thing. Towards the end of last year I lowered my sights to a more manageable 50 rejections but I'm thinking that even this is going to be a bit of a challenge for 2019. Which publishers, what residencies and other opportunities can I apply to this year? Unless I have new material I can't resend things to the same folk who've already seen that ms. Unless I have new projects ready to go I can't apply for this years residencies. But if I'm so busy applying and submitting when do I find time to write? And what is realistic to apply for? New Zealand is a small place. How far afield can I reasonably send/apply for things? Ergo, there is a limit to the list. So I may need to revise things down again. On the flip side I think keeping at this takes an emotional toll as well. How much time can you spend researching possibilities, crafting appropriate submissions, get your hopes up, wait impatiently longer than you thought you would have to and then receive the rejection (or as is the case so often these days, pass the deadline when they say they will respond by if they are interested, and wonder for ages afterwards how hard and fast that deadline is) and by crikey it isn't healthy. The benefit, of course, is meant to be that the more you submit/apply the more chances you have of a yes. But there is a cost, and I think its exponential rather than incremental and should not be overlooked. There needs to be a balance, so it might take a while to find out the submission ambition that works best for you. Look after yourselves people.

I have also been thinking on the perennial question about multiple submissions. Should you submit your ms to more than one publisher at a time? In a world where writers submit to agents first (not so much New Zealand although there is a whiff that we are heading more and more in this direction) this isn't an issue. I think in general agents accept you will be approaching more than one agent at a time. But in the distant past it was deemed the polite thing to send your ms to one publisher at a time. They were investing their time, expertise and effort in considering your manuscript. If others were also looking and saying 'yes' first then their time could have been wasted. When it takes 3 or 4 months for a response - okay. But, as a general rule of thumb, most publishers tend to take longer than they advise on their websites. It might be 6, 8, 9 or more than 12 months. Please respect your own time as well folks. Over the years I have also realised that most publishers here in NZ have particular tastes and publishing niches. Yes there is a risk that more than one publisher will want the same ms, but it is probably lower than you think. And (and this is a big and), what if your manuscript is about to hit a trend? The trends we see are coming at the end point of one to two years lead time on an accepted ms (which might have taken 6 months to a year to be considered and accepted). That one to three years lead time can be swallowed up by one publisher looking at your work who then says no and the trend sails by without you. I think multiple submissions are okay. If a publisher asks that you submit only to them, decide on their suitability for your project. If they rate high then it might be worth the risk of a single submission to them first before moving on to others. If they rate low, send to them last. And if you are only submitting to one publisher before consigning a work to the bottom drawer and starting on a new project you are doing this wrong. See above comment about tastes and niches. And remember, should you have two publishers interested, be polite and professional - the bottom line is that your ms finds the best home.

Well I suspect I've ranted enough for one day. I have an appointment to get to and I bet you have work you should be doing too. Happy writing people.     

Writing for children is not the poor relation of writing for adults

I think it's fair to say that children's writing is often seen as inferior to writing for adults. Many children's writers can tell you about the times they've been asked when they are going to write a proper book, a grown up one, for 'real' people. Children are viewed as incomplete adults in need of a lesser (or incomplete) literature. But age based immaturity does not = simple. That's just patronising, and rude.

On occasion I've told myself that I just prefer reading books for children and that is why I write them, but then I remember I've read and continue to read plenty of books written for grown ups - classic literature, literary prize winners, crime novels, thrillers, romance and more - and often enjoyed them and sometimes adored them. So it's not that that sways me to write for children.

The truth is I think writing is a vocation, a calling, a compulsion, or a curse if you like. I have a need to write that is not bound by rational thought or reason. If I try to escape it, it sticks a story worm in my head while whispering 'gotcha.' I write stories for children because these are the ideas that come to me and where my skills seem to lie. I don't ever remember a moment when I consciously chose to write for a younger audience over some other group. I just did. I think the die was cast when the curse was thrown. I think maybe writers for adults are the same. To ascribe some superiority to something you didn't choose seems a bit on the nose.

 You don't control it. It's how your vocation, your compulsion, has manifested itself. Some writers can write for both adults and children but they are the exception, not the rule, and their vocation has been generous (and to imply this means writing either is easy seems a little disingenuous). And I think some writers who do both are clearly better at one over the other and they have strayed from their calling. And some writers who attempt a particular kind of book because it must be easier than their other preferred form usually demonstrate why this is patently not true.

Barriers to writing...

I have been applying some brain twirlings to the business of writing recently as you might imagine after my last post. Why is it easy sometimes and not others? How come the ideas that accumulate and assemble into rational plot lines and sentences in our heads sometimes refuse to fall into line on the page? And why do the same composed words give us joy one day and grief the next? Well I have no answers to any of those questions and I am willingly accepting any that you might offer, but in the meantime I thought I'd talk about a bunch of things that can interfere with our writing.

1) You aren't reading enough and aren't benefiting from the lessons you could be getting if only you read more books demonstrating how good plots, great characters, well composed sentences and expertly applied grammar look and work. Reading can also be inspiring and motivating. And I'm sorry, but if you don't read at all I'm not sure where your desire to be a writer can possibly come from.

2) You are reading too much and everything you read is light years better than anything you've been trying to write, and/or you are reading so much you run out of time to produce your own things. Too many books can overwhelm and demotivate you. It is a delicate balance and it may take a little while to strike it right. Being aware of the potential problem is a good place to start.

3) You aren't living your life. Seriously folks, having a life makes writing easier. Experiences provide raw material for future stories.Where else can you eavesdrop on the juicy conversation of others and find the people who will become the basis for the antagonist in your story who you will gleefully kill off in the most slow and gruesome fashion in your children's comic novel. And for a bonus 190,000 points, living your life will help you keep body and soul together when the writing is proving difficult and deflating. Hanging out with people you love is the best tonic.

4) You forget to feed your creative mind. Seriously, that thing does not work for free and cannot run on empty. And those sad desperate $20 fill ups that have you limping along will not result in the best work. And don't fill the tank with just anything or a constant diet of the same thing. Go watch, listen to, feel and take in, stuff you love, hate, want to analyse, and feel terrifyingly jealous of. All will inform your work in a positive way.

5) You listen too much to your inner voice when its on a downer. Man that thing can be a complete bummer that makes you wonder what the hell you are doing. It can be a broken record with a broken message. Tell yourself the message is boring, or even better, wrong. Graft in some positive mantras. Or listen to yourself give someone else some good advice and then use it too.

6) You give more weight to the negative voices of others than you do to the positive ones. This a classic. The negative feedback just seems so much more believable because it chimes in with what our inner voice has been telling us. Here is one of the reasons you need to deal to your inner voice. And remember if you choose to believe the criticisms, then you must also believe the compliments. They are no less worthy of your trust.

7) You don't eat properly, get enough sleep or get any exercise. You either treat your body like a temple, or a public toilet. Now think about what each of those might produce.

Things that don't matter

a) having the perfect place to write. Writing is conveniently portable and transferable. You can do it just about anywhere although I hear pen ink freezes in Antarctica. If you are delaying writing while you look for the right place, you are not writing.

b) having that world changing story idea. There are no new ideas, and even if that isn't true, waiting for something that no one has ever thought of before in thousands of years of civilization and written expression will stop you honing your craft, so, if and when that idea appears, you won't be skilled enough to write it. Of course if your world changing idea appears immediately I don't want to talk to you

c) believing there is some insight or secret that will make all the difference in finding writing success. 'Lots of writing' is the only secret I've discovered that works so far, in twenty years of writing experience. Do some writing while you wait

Keeping my head in the game...

I have been working a lot over recent times on keeping my head in the game. Being a writer has never been an easy road and without a doubt it has become a lot harder over the last few years. I'm a bit of a slow learner because it has taken me a while to see that doing things the way I've done them in the past in terms of submissions and queries and revising is no longer working. In my defense my methods were previously never 100% effective because publishing, so it took me a while to see change might be needed, and, also in my defense, I have been trying a range of new things, and with the creeping pace of publishing nothing is an obvious failure until you've given it a decent go. This might mean waiting a year or more. Sometimes under different circumstances they wouldn't be a failure, so then there is a debate over hanging in there with that thing versus shelving it and pushing on. It doesn't help that there is a wide range of complicating variables over which you have no control in the publishing world. Publishers come and go. Staff within a publishing house come, go and move up, down and sideways. Trends happen, timing is a thing, and sometimes it is not your friend (although at other moments it can be everything). Sometimes global political and economic fluctuations remove the rug from under us. This is all an enormous challenge/hurdle at the best of times, and these are not the best of times. Feedback is generally a half formed thing (if it is given at all) and is not always clear with a single meaning. We are trained to read between lines and cannot stop ourselves from doing it. Sometimes they are just cushioning the no and meaning should not be ascribed despite it looking like it should be. Sometimes the thing you think you need to fix is not the thing that needs fixing at all. It is a guessing game. And not just for the writer.

  

So, what am I doing now? I'm currently looking for strategies on how to resurface my self encouraging mantras that have been wearing thin over time. Something like electroplating, cos another coat of varnish just won't cut the mustard anymore. 

I'm sticking with the traditional publishing route for the moment. As fraught as it is, I know where my strengths lie and I know not everything I write can handle the rigours of appearing in book form.  For better or worse I prefer to take my chances with the traditional.

I'm looking at previously unexplored publishers and how to reach them. Submitting overseas is notoriously difficult but worth a try. I am researching opportunities and their relative worth: conferences with pitching sessions, workshops and competitions. I am also reinvestigating trying to find an agent. If one took me on this would electroplate my mantras and expose my work to a wider range of publishers. 

Taking action of any kind is a good thing. Stewing in ones own juices, especially when the water hasn't been changed for months is a sure fire way to get some noxious, stagnant water-borne disease. From time to time you should update the plan.  

And I'm choosing not to change the way I write. This may sound counter-intuitive but I am not unhappy with the way I approach stories. I like what I'm producing. I will however keep pushing myself to create better things. Hopefully the world will come back round to meet me.

If a tree falls in a forest...

Feeling all existential this week. So, you know the argument. If a tree falls in a forest and no one is there to hear it, does it make a sound? My SO and I have batted this one back and forth from time to time, neither one of us budging from our preferred stand on the debate. Does sound rely on a receiver to exist? What do you think? And why am I asking? Well, it occurs to me that being a writer is a bit like this. If you produce work that no one reads are you still a writer?

Bear with me.

There is a saying - Publishing is a business, writing an art. The two will never completely see eye-to-eye. Sure some writers work on commercial principles, writing, as much as it is possible to do so, for the market. They focus on commercial titles which have a greater chance of selling in volume. Of course there are no guarantees. All writers take a risk that their fall in the forest will be unheard. Some of us write stories that try to answer some other need. At first publication is the yardstick of our success. And if we are published, then sales, further publication and perhaps even short-listings and awards become the new yardsticks. All of us want to be heard. We crave a receiver for our sound. The more receivers the better. It's our greatest fear. That we aren't real if no one hears our voice.

But hang on ... just backing the truck up here. That tree created sound. Celebrate the act of creation folks. Cos humanity sometimes gets a little caught up with the measures of things rather than the creation itself. What is the object of our pursuit? The commerce? Or the creation? Personally I think it's cool to seek both. On the whole, we are social creatures who like to share what we do. I need a way to show others (publication) and understandably I hope they enjoy it (sales, short-listings). And if I'm honest I personally find the measures highly desirable. My ego likes a good stroking as much as the next person does. So what happens when the gap between strokes widens? Truth is, the only thing you can control is what you produce. You can't control the publishers, the market place, the readers, so focus on the product. In some ways I can't even control that. If there is a switch inside my brain that would allow me to stop the urge to write I am yet to find it. So I am bound to keep creating. If no one is listening I intend to focus my attention on making the sounds regardless. Gotta make the best tree-falling noises I can. And just gotta be a tree that can keep getting back up again ;-)

The Tricksy Business of Novel Writing ...

I am loving hanging out at the Pah Homestead - it is a stunning oasis surrounded by suburbia, with views and art and lush greenness and creative vibes. I have the loveliest space to work in and zero distractions. And there is a cafe right beneath me if I need fuel or refreshment. I am already cracking on with the new project which is very exciting. And somewhat surprising.

Before I wrote my first complete novel, Jack the Viking, back in 2005/2006 I was riddled with a lot of assumptions about how writers and publishing worked. I wish I'd written them down because they would give me a jolly good chuckle now. They shared little in common with reality. One revolved around the notion that once I'd written my first novel all subsequent novels would be easy to write because I would 'know' how to do it. Hahahahahahahaha - no.

Another was the idea that you started at the start and worked your way through to the end.

And you completed a first draft, then reworked the story through however many drafts it needed till it was the polished gem it had to be for submission.

And that you could treat it like a daily job. 9 to 5.

Yeah.

And if you think there is one right way to write a novel STOP. You are wrong! But hang on, actually, in a way, you are also right.

Arghhh - tricksy business!!

The truth is...

There are many different ways to write a novel. Planning it in great detail, chapter by chapter. Or starting with the flash of an idea and just seeing where it leads you. Working in a linear fashion from start to finish, starting at the end and working backwards, or shifting around constantly filling in bits all over the place. If none of these is how you are doing it, that's Ok. The way that is working for you is the right way.

Cherish that first time you write The End. And every subsequent time as well. Celebrate it. Because each time will be an achievement of a significant magnitude. Completing a novel will indeed teach you an awful lot about the novel writing process. Trouble is, it changes us as well. I don't want to do the same thing I did last time. I want to push myself and try harder and be more ambitious. I want to try and explore more challenging topics. I want to be a better writer. Always. I hope each novel improves on the one before. But they are never easy.

I wish I could write a predetermined number of words every day. 1000 sounds nice. How easy it would be to plan my life. Make a writing habit, people say. Just sit down at the desk and start typing they say. It's all about discipline. Hah. If only my brain obeyed my wishes. If only the rest of my life would stay uncomplicated, with a good night's sleep every night, without crises and unexpected demands, surprises and disappointments and things that occupy your conscious unbidden like a protest group on a sit in. It's hard work creating something completely new out of your imagination. Some days are good days with lots of lovely words flowing freely. Other days are best forgotten. At least I know I am capable of completing a project and, like eating an elephant (metaphorically of course), it is best achieved one bite at a time. I might not make the story longer every day but at least I try to make it better.

It has been a novel experience with the new project. Up till now my previous stories have been told in linear order, start to finish. This time ideas are popping up from different parts of the story. I jot everything down and then type it in where I think it belongs best. I can cut and paste later if need be. It is a little discomforting because to a certain extent my brain likes order. But the beginning is resisting arrest and I could easily get stuck there. And my mind is leaping ahead. Why not follow it and see where it goes? I am willing to accept that this way, as odd as it is for me, might produce a finished product equally well, so it makes sense to give in to it. I have a loose framework in mind for the plot, so I will just have to make sure every part is in place when I am done. Piece of cake. Hmmm.

And drafts. In the past I have drafted and redrafted as I've gone along. My first complete draft has been massaged and titivated as I've gone along. It makes me slower but then I end up with a product closer to a final version. Swings and roundabouts I suppose. It works for me so I will keep doing it that way. Unless I change my mind and do it a different way because that seems right at the time. I never say never. The aim is to complete a manuscript I am happy with. How I get there is open to change.

Why yes, I do have an opinion on that...

Well, look at that! I am reading and talking as part of the Read Aloud Programme for Schools for The Press Christchurch Writers Festival in August. Super excited! Writers Festivals are a little slice of heaven.

Some folk have been complaining about adults reading YA. Here and here. Cos ya know YA is just dumbed down stuff and talks about issues that have no relevance or interest for adults.What are we thinking reading that puerile stuff. Cos like children and young adults are, ya know, like some simple, inferior version of like, grown up people. Sheesh. Folk reacted, responded, or went a little septic, here and here. What do I think (cos y'all know I am bound to have an opinion on this)? There is an arrogance that underlies some of the criticisms of YA literature. That young adults and children are simple, un-smart versions of adults. That YA books can only offer the adult reader escapism, instant gratification and nostalgia (and it is obviously embarrassing to want these from a book). That YA literature is incapable of dealing with complex, important or challenging themes.  That grown up issues are somehow better and more important than issues facing younger people. Is Malala Yousafzai's experience simpler and less important because she is a teen? Can we not join the 'real' realm of adulthood if we don't read 'difficult' adult literature. But perhaps the thing that I wonder most about this brouhaha is why? Why the complaints and criticisms? And why do folk see the need to denigrate a book category to further their agenda? I wonder if perhaps some writers of adult literature aren't happy that adults are buying and reading YA books rather than adult books. They want to shame us into changing our reading habits. I just can't help thinking that telling me I should be embarrassed is the wrong way to go about getting me to change my behaviour. And making sweeping generalisations about YA books of which many are diverse and rich and well written is just, well, poor ammunition. Of course not all YA books are sophisticated and smart. But then neither are all adult books. And children and young adults might lack experience but they don't lack brains, or feelings. And they can be faced with issues just as complex as those facing adults. And if they aren't there yet, doesn't mean some of the books don't contain those more difficult themes for when they are. Because the thing that irks me most about this whole debate is thinking that the way to win me over is by telling me YA books are beneath me. That there is something wrong or bad about that kind of literature. Perhaps if the critics had spent more time impressing and exciting me with the books they would like me to read, I would be more open to their suggestions. I just want to read good books, regardless of the target audience.

Excited by words...

When people ask me why I am a writer I usually tell them I am hoping to replicate the joy for others that I experienced as a young reader. I spent so many very happy hours lost in the pages of a good story. I can think of no better use of my time (apart from hanging with my loved ones) than trying to create a reading experience that transports a child to somewhere fascinating, fun, exciting or all of these. But there is another reason. I am rather in love with words.

Like physicists are exploring space to understand the origins of the Universe and create a unified theory about how we and the world work at the most basic atomic level, or mathematicians look to find proof of Fermat's Theorem, I am looking to arrange and rearrange words to create another kind of magic. Despite the fact that words have been around for thousands of years, it is still possible to come up with novel combinations that make us laugh, cry, or feel a sudden enlightening. Or just give the reader a sense of hope or potential about themselves or their future.

Even when we acknowledge there are really no new plots in the world, there are still books being published that are stunning in their originality. I guess in part we are constantly incorporating all we have read, heard, and seen, and the spells in our minds must, as a result, be unique. When I write for children I am conscious of all the wonderful writing for children that has gone before me. I like to leave clues to other childhood stories, fairy tales and nursery rhymes that I have experienced and enjoyed. And I hope that maybe there are young readers out there who have come across the same children's literature that I have and perhaps they recognize my allusions and feel that little thrill of understanding that make them feel a little extra special. Or they see magic in the words and are impatient to go out and find more, to feel that thrill of all that is possible with language. Maybe...

so I was very happy to see this review of my book While You Are Sleeping for Magpies Magazine, by Trevor Agnew.

This handsome picture book explains to young readers just what goes on while they are asleep. Double page spreads show people on the other side of the world enjoying the sunshine. Meanwhile, on our side of the planet it is night. While you are sleeping night creatures wake and eat breakfast in the dark. Nocturnal birds move among the trees, while fish weave their way through black waters. People come out to work and the reader sees trucks dashing through the darkness, bakers rising from their beds, and farmers donning gumboots, while their cows queue for the dawn milking. Some of the word play is charming. While you are sleeping the moon jumps over the cows. Echoes can be heard from nursery rhymes.
Finally the narrative returns to the young sleeper. While you are sleeping your mind and body will rest and grow.
The text is printed in white lettering against the dark night-time backgrounds but it is very legible.
Greg Straight's colour illustrations are a superb evocation of the night. Magnificently stylised owls are to be seen in every picture, while the endpapers repeat the night-sky image of dark purple heavens with silver stars. The stars get their chance to shine. Each picture contains an unexpected detail for readers to seek out: mice, cats, possums and moreporks [owls].
While You Are Sleeping is a wonderful book to share with young readers, especially those who don't see why they should go to sleep.
Trevor Agnew

Some thoughts on didacticism...

When literature first began to be written with children in mind, the stories produced were generally of an improving nature: 'didactic' texts with a moral lesson, stories that set out the rules of how adults expected or wanted children to behave. Be seen and not heard, mind your manners and your elders, be kind, don't steal, poke, provoke, be proud, or rude, gobble your food and so on. Sometimes these were bible stories - parables from the testaments, old and new, that extolled virtuous behaviour. Aesop's Fables provided a more secular set of aphorisms to live by.

However the didacticism inherent in early children's literature was probably somewhat hypocritical, coming across potentially as more of a 'do as I say and not as I do' kind of literature. At the time adults were just realising that children needed books aimed specifically at them, adult literature had itself already developed well past the Bible, Torah, Quran, and other religious tomes guiding and directing adult values. Well before then, the likes of Chaucer and Shakespeare had already injected the sensational and the bawdy into their work. They were riffing on the behaviours of actual humanity rather than some ideal. By the time children were acknowledged as something other than miniature adults, adults were reading romances, westerns, and the drudgery and cruelty of Dickens. Good fiction was about the best and worst of people, warts and all. Reading had already developed into an activity offering entertainment to adults. Children however were seen as something to be molded and controlled and their reading was written accordingly.  And yet not only were adults reading literature which was definitely not 'improving,' they were often expecting more of their offspring than they were capable of themselves. 

As literature grew and evolved, so too did an understanding of the child reader, and writing for children became a more complex and richly structured endeavour. Writing morphed from being stories about what adults wanted children to know and be, and became more about subjects and issues that concerned children directly. What was going on in their lives and what was of interest to them. Reading meets a multiplicity of needs in a child - learning to read, providing information, entertainment and pleasure, tasting the world and all its variety, and learning about how language is used. It must offer more than just moral guidance.  

Didactic texts aim to teach the reader. To a certain extent all literature teaches, not just in terms of literacy but in terms of the larger underlying themes and messages. Non-fiction works clearly contain material which 'informs' but fiction also informs providing a window onto experiences that readers can find their own lessons in. Any well-written book with substance will inform and teach in some way.  

In its simplest form a good story offers an opportunity for the reader to observe the behaviour of others and decide how it applies to them. The best children's books put a child at the centre of the story. They teach critical thinking and give children the tools to solve their own problems. They deal with themes that are practical and real, even when cloaked in the guise of fantasy or science fiction, history or horror. Encouraging good behaviour is not a bad thing, but children are not just blank slates on which good rules alone must be written. Children are complex creatures, just as adults are. We want them to become independent thinkers who judge for themselves how and why to be good people. 

Children's literature has to be relevant to who they are and what they are experiencing. Life is rarely simple, or fair, and no one is perfect. Books will have a bigger impact on a child if they reflect the full richness of experience rather than some distilled advice or a blatant lecture. In less well thought out moments I have attempted to give my children lectures and it is the fastest way to make them glaze over. And if we have all managed to get through to the end they eventually remind me that they already knew what I was hectoring them about. Because the good life lessons are best engendered in context, through real life example. So where is the line between too didactic and just right? If the lesson is visible on the surface you have crossed the line. If everyone in the story learns to be a better person you have probably crossed the line. If there is nothing 'else' to the story you have crossed the line. If it feels like a parable or a fable you have probably crossed the line. If it feels like a fairy tale, a nursery rhyme or a cautionary tale you are actually probably in safer territory. And I don't mean Disney fairy tales or nursery rhymes, I mean the originals where sometimes dreadful things happened and there was no clear message or moral. And just remember - you can lead a horse to water but you cannot make them drink.
  

(Note: Should you choose to print all or part of this post, re-post or use this material in any other way, please acknowledge me as its author, and where appropriate, provide a link to the original blog post. Thank you :) )

The moment of absolute certainty ...

There is always a point in the life of a book when I wonder, what was I thinking, and, everyone is going to hate this. Usually it happens after everything is signed off - words, design, cover, and artwork if it's a picture book. The file has gone off to the printers and we all smiled as we waved goodbye to all that promise. Time passed. And then I am sure - this is the worst book I ever wrote. Every time. It happens every time. And while some small rational part of me knows that this is a normal part of the life-cycle of a new book I feel it just the same. What was I thinking. I shouldn't have eaten all those fruit loops - too much sugar!!! Or stayed up so late, or slept in that long. I should have done this, that or the other instead of what I actually did. Any other intelligent being would have seen that. So obvious. Gah.

Folks, the moment of absolute certainty never arrives. It is a rude and unfeeling fleeting entity that teases you with it's possibility and then stays just out of reach, just like the fastest kid in school in bull-rush. And doubting yourself and your work is a normal part of being creative. You are pulling things out of your own imagination and rinsing them through your rational brain and then giving it to the rest of the world and praying they like it enough to want to part with money to own a copy of it. Yikes - I think that just made me feel worse.

Anyway ... If you are doubting yourself and your work - you are NORMAL. If you feel uncertain, that is how certainty works. If you aren't sure you've got everything perfect in your manuscript, don't worry. It will never be perfect to everyone's satisfaction. Most of all your own.

For myself, I always end up remembering why I wrote the story in the first place and how good I felt about it when I first sent it off. And I always fall in love again.

A competition - make me a better person

My preparations for Dunedin so far? I am breaking my Docs in. I am (mentally) putting aside DVDs and books I want to take with me. It is going well.

Recently I passed my 700th post (I think this is post 702). I fancy having another competition. More on that later.

Meantime I am working on a few other more imminent things - principally an exhibit about my book While You Are Sleeping for the What Lies Beneath Exhibition at the National Library in Parnell, Auckland starting next Monday January 20th.

And thinking, always, about how I can raise the reputation of children's literature. Folk sometimes recognize the importance of children's books and probably do understand the value in switching children on to being readers. But there is a persistent refusal to believe that a children's book might be literary, like an adult book can be literary. That it might be clever, challenging, thought provoking and capable of making you a better person. This article has been doing the rounds on facebook. It is interesting. I have read a few of the books. I'm not sure they all changed me. I have read other books not on the list that 'have' changed me. But that's always the way with lists. I never agree with everything included, or not included - they are subjective entities. That's okay. But this isn't okay. The one children's book on the list of 50 life changing books is introduced by way of an apology. Sorry for including a children's book. I hope it doesn't offend you reader. Ya know its a children's book, but it somehow actually manages to still have a message that might be of interest/be beneficial to an adult. Maybe it was an accident. Okay - I apologise for my sarcastic tone (lowest form of wit, yada yada, yada), but the tone they have adopted encourages the continued subordination of children's literature to adult literature. This is the common consensus. And if it is never challenged it will never change. Children's books can be transformative for both child readers and adult readers.

So for my competition, to win a copy of one of my books (your choice of any of my books except Clever Moo which are now like hen's teeth or any short story anthologies I am included in as I don't have copies of these), tell me the name of a children's book that changed you (you can comment here or on facebook or Goodreads). I will pick my favourite - judges decision is final and no correspondence will be entered into. One winner only - competition closes this Sunday 19th at 8pm. Examples for me would be The Earthsea Trilogy, The Outsiders, The Little Prince, The Changeover, The Lion in the Meadow, Where the Wild Things Are (...'and it was still hot'), to name a few... So get cracking!!

The qualities and habits of a children's writer...

Some folk think writing for children is somehow easier than writing for adults. I tend to think they have forgotten that writers for adults have more in common with their audience and in truth might often be considered to be writing for someone who is essentially themselves. Writing for an audience from whose company you were separated some decades previous adds a certain degree of difficulty. Factor in that childhood now is a very different kettle of fish from what it used to be and you add another degree or 30 - when I was a child I rode around the nearby cul de sac with the other neighbourhood kids till after dark, and went all sorts of places on my own recognisance. There was no internet. No cellphones. No playstations. It is not overstating it to say that times and childhood have changed considerably and irrevocably. The gap to be bridged between childhood and adulthood, between then and now, requires a special kind of engineering. That children's writers make it look easy, is not because it is. It is because they have some unique skills.

So what habits and qualities facilitate the development of these skills?

1) Read children's books.
2) Be in touch with the child you were
3) Be in touch with the child you still have inside you now.
4) No lecturing, hectoring, badgering and preaching unless you are a lecturer, Hector, badger or preacher, and even then, don't do it.
5) Don't be afraid for your audience
6) Don't be reckless with your audience
7) Be smart
8) Be silly
9) Be honest
10) Be respectful
11) work hard

If you think these things are easy, you are doing them wrong. And there are no shortcuts.

Happily hanging out in a parallel universe...

My first story was accepted for publication back in July 2002. A second was accepted in October of the same year and ended up coming out first in April 2003. Both were short stories. My first picture book was accepted 2004 and my first novel in 2006. I'd been writing for several years before that first acceptance and dabbling secretly for many years before that.

If I knew what lay ahead of me before the first 'yes' I don't think I would have believed it. Not because it is more than I could have imagined. Although at times it has been (and then there have been the other times when it has been downright depressing and way less than what I hoped for). Not because publishing and books are inexorably changed from when I started out - and they are, in ways few could have predicted. It is because this has turned out nothing like my expectations, and the more time passes the less sure I am of what will happen next.

Don't get me wrong - I like where I am at. I'm proud and excited by the way things are going most of the time. But if you'd asked me to predict where I'd be ten or 15 years down the track I don't think you would have been able to accuse me at any point of having ESP.

Which leads to a small problem I have when I think about what advice to give new writers.  Okay, all the basics are still true. The fundamental tenets of writing and editing are still the same. Characters, plots, settings and voice all function pretty much like they always have (okay maybe they have gone a bit post-postmodern). And the advice about joining organisations and writers groups is still true. Even the rules about submitting are still the same, although the range of alternatives to traditional submissions has widened. But at some point I seem to have hopped onto a parallel universe. One populated by that alien chameleon Benedict Cumberbatch. Where time runs differently, sometimes indifferently, and never uniformly. Where the things most likely to happen don't, but the most unexpected and often lovely things do. And the best piece of advice I can give you now was crystallised in my mind as I watched the weirdest sitcom on tv last night "Don't Trust the Bitch in Apartment 23". It's not rocket science. And it's not new (and that programme is really very strange). Networking is how you make things happen. Sending your CV out, honing your letter of introduction and waiting at home for the phone to ring have their place. But more things are likely to happen if you get out there and shake hands, introduce yourself, get seen and take a chance. That doesn't mean you can push things. Results are usually best when they happen organically. As in, you plant that seed, water it and walk away and wait for the sun and time to make things grow. I've had eggs in baskets that haven't hatched and yet chicks have popped up in other places. I've tossed my hat in the ring and had it flung back at me, hitting me in the back of the head. But sometimes it gets returned with an invitation. Or with bells on.

I can't guarantee you results. No one can. But you have a greater chance of being in the right place at the right time if you go places where things happen. Fill in those stretches where the only thing that happens is your impatience, by making new connections, saying yes to things that drag you out of your comfort zone and where you don't even say anything but you see and are seen.And be open to things. Because I'm discovering the unexpected is a pretty great place to find yourself in.

Now that I've exhausted all my metaphors we are off to have a rest.

Did I write that? What do I do with it now?...

A while back I wittered about 'brand'. Brand has been a hot topic and as part of our self marketing plan we have been exhorted to develop one. Initially I thought this a good idea and tried to tie myself into a single package with a suitable summation of what me and my books are. Then I decided, well, actually, no, I am me in all my complex, ever-changing glory and a standard 'brand' box is the wrong size and shape to represent me. I like to think readers can rely on me to get something interesting and 'a little different' but it might come in a variety of forms, genre, length, etc.... I don't want to be tied down to a brand either. There are all sorts of exciting possibilities out there. But brand has another side which I cannot avoid in the same way. Some time back I wrote a picture book story. The main character was a bit of a wayward boy and in the end he learns to be better behaved. The story has some charm and some humour. The characters are kind of fun. It is polished and edited and I am happy with the writing. But it has a whiff of the didactic about it (you could probably already tell, right?). Publishers in general aren't keen on didactic. I am not that keen on it myself. But I like this story. It has been turned down by a couple of publishers with some interesting (and opposing) feedback. Do I keep sending it out? Would I be happy if it was a book? Do I want my name printed on the cover of a didactic text? Can I draw a line between too didactic and just a little bit didactic?

This might seem like an odd dilemma but I can tell you right now, even with all the sales and money involved, I would not want my name on the front of 50 Shades of Grey. Are there books you wouldn't want your name on the front of? There are certainly some books I wish I had written. Is the converse true? Do I chalk this one up to experience and file it in the drawer forever?

A baker's dozen of writery advice....

Some new tips for writing in these tricky times. The rules have changed. Writing and publishing have become a wide open field of possibility. Be brave, have fun, but let's be careful out there...

1). Read as if your life depended on it. To become a good writer you must learn to recognize good writing. The best writing for you to learn is the kind you love reading the most; that you enjoy; that best satisfies your reading needs. Folk might try telling you only one kind of writing is the good kind. I would rather write the kind of book I love to read. They are my benchmark for good writing.
2) Don't jump in without checking the water first. There might be sharks, mermaids or pirates, none of whom will help you. Don't let ignorance be your excuse for being eaten alive, being lured by the siren, or being plundered for booty.
3) Ideas are two faced and will abandon you when you need them most. Don't call them, they'll call you. Have faith in the fact that they are there, whether you can see them or not. Eventually they will show themselves
4) Some ideas take years to develop. If you like the look of it don't give up on an idea just because it refuses to grow. Put it aside and let it prove
5) Act like a writer. Write. Think about writing. Write some more. Make friends with other writers. Read. Write some more. Put writing first sometimes.
6) The buck stops with you. People can give you advice and you can choose whether or not to take it. This is very exciting. But don't forget the responsibilities and the consequences of your decisions will also be yours.
7) Reward yourself. When things go well. When things don't go so well. You will write better if you feel good about it
8) Take care of yourself. Rest, eat, exercise, see people, get fresh air, laugh.
9) Celebrate any successes. If you haven't had a success for a while - celebrate an old one. I recommend wrapping successes in gladwrap so they stay fresher longer.
10) Don't be afraid to find new dreams. This does not necessarily mean getting rid of old ones. But as it appears it is still possible to achieve your dreams it pays to update them regularly.
11) Instincts can be quite trustworthy. If you are not sure about your own, find friends who have good ones and ask their opinion. If a bad decision happens, unless it stops you breathing, know that you will get past it. Do your best to learn what you can from it.
12) Be happy that you are doing what you love, no matter how it turns out
13) Know that no one has all the answers - even the biggest smartypants

Not dead yet...

For some reason at the moment I seem to be in no-man's land, or all at sea (get your free overworked metaphor here ladies and gentlemen). There is progress with upcoming and previously published books, I am writing (not as much as I would like, but getting some work done) and reading (although only books prescribed by my university course) and getting ready for several upcoming author events (see next post). There have been some disappointments (things I applied or hoped for and didn't get) and then some small surprises (things most unexpected which I will tell you about soon), so business as usual really. But too much multi-tasking is making me a little jumbled. If everything would just slow down for a minute.

But as we all know change is happening all the time. Children keep growing up, publishers keep dropping by the wayside (we bid a sad farewell to Hachette who will be departing our shores in the near future, following Pearson and Harper Collins). And of course Penguin and Random are now a married couple and while it kind of seems business as usual I assume there will be changes there too. And educational publishing seems to have been attacked by the Borg. So far all these departures and transformations haven't impacted directly on me. I wasn't published by most of those folk and in some respects they have created a small vacuum which will in part be filled by those publishers remaining, some of whom are mine. But my friends are affected. And publishing as a whole in New Zealand is affected. And people are shocked and afraid and sad. In some respects we are powerless to do anything about it.

But then there is the news that Eleanor Catton's latest novel The Luminaries is longlisted for the prestigious Man Booker Prize. And you look at the awards locally and you can't help but notice the writing in New Zealand is in really good shape. Our books are stronger than ever I reckon. And more beautiful. And perhaps gaining more notice overseas. And did you see the crowd funded nominee among the NZ Post Book Award finalists and the fact that the supreme winner of the NZ Post Children's (and YA) Book Awards was self published. So I don't want to despair. Things are a changin' but writing isn't dead or dying. I don't quite feel 'really excited' by all the changes either as some would exhort me to be - I came up through the traditional publication route and there are plenty of things I like about it. There are challenges ahead. I just reckon I'll get further by being positive about it :)

How the word cumquat could help you win a book...

Sometimes I like books that are just a gob-smackingly good read - with luscious language, pace and a plot so cunning you could put a tail on it and call it a weasel. The ones that make you feel like 'I didn't really know reading satisfaction, until I read this book.' Sometimes I like books that make me think, challenge my preconceptions and tie my brain in useful kinds of knots, like some metaphorical, metaphysical macrame pot plant holder. But my most favourite books are the ones that are the former, with the latter secretly hidden inside. The entertainy, learny kind all rolled into one 'oh-my-goodness-I am-so-devastated-it-is-over-how-will-I-live-without-it-but-look-how-much-smarter-I-am-about-the-world-now' package. These are the books that you want to un-remember so you can read them for the first time again ... and again.

I like to try and write books that make people think. That aren't just superficial and glossy but have some kind of greater meaning or examination of universal themes or revelation of some useful truths, or helpful ideas that people can take away and use in their own lives. Sometimes I think I get there, sometimes I almost get there: but it is always the goal. Words are a powerful medium. And with power comes great responsibility. A book is one of the safest ways to venture outside your comfort zone. To gain an insight in to the lives of others. And it is my job to put it in an entertainy, learny package that makes you put it back on your book pile to read again.

Authors work very hard to draw the reader in. To help them see what the author sees. The brilliant Maggie Stiefvater explains it well here. And shows exactly why some books need more than one reading to get the most out of them.

And because I now have a total of 40 followers I am going to have a competition. You can win any one of my books (except the first one, Clever Moo) in print, or where available, in a digital format if you prefer. Enter by commenting on this post with the title of the book you would like to win and with your favourite word (no swears please). I will pick my favourite of your favourite words as the winner. For example 'phalanges' is quite an amazing word, or 'cumquat'. The competition will close on Friday.

Sending our babies out in to the world...

How do you know you're a writer? In my previous life in the normal/real world I had a regular paying job in an office, working (mostly) on the business management side of Hospitals and (more briefly) Universities. My eldest recently started a new job and I was telling her this morning that it can take a while to settle in and feel comfortable in the role. It takes a while for the newness and shyness to rub off and the tasks required to feel second nature. I believe this to be true. In fact I know this to be true. Because although in my previous life I never ever felt completely comfortable in my work life, I did stop feeling new and shy and all at sea. But I am now completely comfortable in my current job...as a writer...for the rest of my life. I have settled in. The newness and shyness have rubbed off and the tasks required feel more natural.

The day before yesterday I remembered an old manuscript I had shelved a while back (in 2009); a manuscript that almost made it but of whom several folk had said it needs fixing without being able to put their finger on exactly what the problem was. Yesterday I brought it out and I looked at it and saw straight away where it didn't seem to work and straight away I twiddled and tweaked and rearranged and dusted and polished. I don't know if it will cross the finish line but it's a better story now. How did that happen? I'm not exactly sure but I rather like it. And I have re-submitted the story to a publisher.

Oh, and I can now confirm my picture book The House That Went to Sea will be sailing off to China to be published there in English and Chinese versions. Bon voyage little book, fare you well!

Without a parachute...

The life of a book is equivalent to a piece of string. How long is the piece of string, you might ask? Well as long as the life of a book.

Yes....exactly.

My first picture book is now out of print. All my other print books are still out there I believe, but I am under no illusion that OOP can strike at any time. When a new book is launched it feels like it is everywhere and then the following month new books are launched and they are everywhere and your book not so much, and the honeymoon can feel, well, over. I am not complaining. I did get the chocolate on the pillow, the romantic pics on the beach, and the late wake up call. So it is rather nice to have reviews still wandering in for a book launched back in March. Thanks to Bookwitch for a nice review of A Winter's Day in 1939 here in the UK. And if you check that book's page on Fishpond NZ there is a great review there too. And I liked this one on Goodreads - short and sweet but quite complimentary really. Each one feels like another lovely surprise chocolate on my pillow.

And in breaking news, it seems a picture book of mine published a few years back may be translated and sold in another country. More news on that when/if it all comes together. Very exciting. I know of other folks whose books have been picked up overseas 5 years after publication. I never give up hope. A short story of mine waited 7 years from acceptance to print. Time becomes Einstein fluid in the publishing world, or perhaps publishing all happens inside the Tardis and who knows what time it is in the world outside. My one regret is that the eternal youth of the space traveller doesn't seem to be applying to me. Anyways... I digress. The answer to how long is the life of a book is patience. My patience has slowly become a well-oiled, efficient little machine: overworked but better at its job than it used to be. It hums along these days, now that I've switched it to the long game setting.

Fellow blogger Maureen Crisp linked to this wonderful piece by Libba Bray; wonderful and somewhat distressing. Ms Bray talks about 'writing despair' - the despair of failing to bend a story to your will and make it work. For all the times we feel this despair and work through it to end up with a story that we are happy with, we know there are no guarantees this will happen next time. We live in fear. We break through and then admonish ourselves for ever thinking we couldn't do it. And then we start all over again. In my writing, like Ms Bray, I am untethered by outlines and structure and Scrivener and rolodexes full of character eye colour, and background, and inside leg measurement. I wing it. Without a parachute. Sometimes this works better than other times. The biggest stumbling block for me is always fear - will I stuff up this great idea. It looks so pretty/smart/elegant in my head but turns in to a hoiked-up fur ball on the page. People who think series or sequels are such a great idea because you already have that world and those characters built be warned - you can no longer bend that world or those wills anew to your own purposes. You made rules last time and now they must be obeyed. And there are expectations. Expectations! If you ever wanted success, know that expectations come with it. And, apparently, fear. The key of course is patience. And I can only hope, for Ms Bray's sake and mine, that the length of the life of the book will be positively influenced by the length of its gestation.

And then there was Benedict Cumberbatch's voice...

I have a big list of things to do - BIG - so I went to the movies and saw Star Trek Into Darkness which I may need to see again for the purposes of quality control and I just watched the first two episodes of Parade's End back to back and it has all messed with my head and I am disinclined to do ANYTHING which means of course I am now posting on my blog. That Benedict Cumberbatch boy is a chameleon with a voice that could lure you off a precipice. I am worried his head will inflate till it explodes because everyone is going round saying he's amazing as Sherlock/Christopher Tietjens/John Harrison/insert latest role here. I'm sorry Benedict but this is unhealthy, you need to be crap at something so you can rejoin the real world.

I liked the new Star Trek. Good work J.J. Plenty of nods and referencing of earlier Star Trek episodes and movies in a reverential kind of way. It was fun telling my co-watcher (middle child) about the scenes that echoed scenes I'd seen in my youth. And yet these fitted seamlessly into the new narrative. I thought it built well on the first movie. And then there was Benedict Cumberbatch's voice. And some good humour, and some excellent running and a stunning spaceship crashing scene and the cleverness of dealing with a spaceship tumbling through space. And then Parade's End focusing on a man struggling to deal with the decline of the rural idyll (yes I am oversimplifying here - sorry). The countryside and the noble tilling of the soil and the sense of community might have been utopia for Tietjens but any society that views cuddling your own child after a nightmare as soft may deserve a little readjustment. All the manners, and the traditions and the contradictions are disturbing and fascinating. And then there's Benedict Cumberbatch's voice. Oh and there's a love triangle. The love triangle is fairly straightforward. One woman is the wife and the other woman is called Valentine. And then there's the man sticking pipes in the bushes so his landowner lord and master can grab one any time and have a smoke - people probably actually did that. I am enjoying it all. So yes I have been waylaid. Let's call it research.

And there has been a lot of sharing and discussion over the last few weeks of Maureen Johnson's gendered-book-cover experiment. You can see her fab article here if you haven't already caught it. I have discussed something similar before. Ms Johnson makes some fair points. It all reminds me of the comment this year in the NZ Post Children's Book Award judges' preface to the finalists. The judges lamented the lack of strong heroines in this year's batch of books. Last year or maybe the year before they probably lamented the lack of books specifically for boys.  I'm not sure why they mentioned it. As if children will falter in their social and gender development without a book this year with a fiesty female character. There is a whole NZ canon out there with heroines and heroes in a variety of genre catering to all readers. Good readers read widely. They can get their heroines and heroes from the wider cache of books from any year, not just this one. Please don't suggest writers should be going out of their way to fill a gap, they're too busy writing the best books about serious and compelling issues with the protagonists that demand their story be told. Or watching Star Trek.