Tuesday, July 22, 2014

Jumping at our own shadows...

Sorry I have been a bit absentee. Things have been busy and I find I am unable to post on my blog during the day. And, well, I have been having doubtie moments. This might seem perverse with books published and things going well etc... but doubts are no respecters of, well, anything, really. For many creative folk it is a normal part of their personality/genetic make-up. We are sensitive souls who jump at our own shadows (when we aren't inserting them into our stories). These things don't have to be logical. Doubt is my middle name.

When you work within an industry which is mediated at every step by personal taste, opinions and subjectivity, and where every step of the process is unpredictable and not necessarily tied in to the value of your writing, well because what is valuable? and how is that value mediated by personal taste, opin....well, you get my drift - things can get tricky and doubtie. Especially when there are so many ways for people to tell you what they think of your work, and then if they don't talk at all, well the silence is VAST. Anyways. So, as you do, I went in search of some good advice online on the topic of doubt and came across some useful stuff - this is helpful, and so is this. The second one is more about dealing with criticism but I think most of our doubts boil down to our worries about how our work will be received. And the lovely thing about these two posts is that they demonstrate that plenty of others also deal with doubts. It is normal to feel doubts. The important thing is not to let those doubts make decisions for you.

Meanwhile The Song of Kauri has had a nice review from Barbara Murison on her fab Around the Bookshops blog. I love how she says -

"The whole beautiful production sings of the kauri – its gold, brown and yellow cover with its embossed koru, the carefully crafted words and the feeling that if you took a deep breath as you turn the pages you would be able to smell the leaf mould of the forest and the heady scent of the kauri gum." 

And I'm thrilled to say, two of the other 2014 University of Otago Fellows, Mozart Fellow Jeremy Mayall and Caroline Plummer Dance Fellow Louise Potiki Bryant have suggested collaborating with me to create music and dance for The Song of Kauri. I'm recording a reading of the book today to accompany the music Jeremy has composed. More details soon on the dance, I hope. This is a first for me, and for one of my books. Exciting times.

I talked up a storm last week down in Invercargill, running a round of workshops for Intermediate students, High School students and adults for the Dan Davin Literary Foundation. I met a host of wonderful people and was well sorted by organiser extraordinaire Becs Amundsen. A cool few days in the deep South. I even got down to Bluff, which was amazing, thanks to Becs. See? 2014 is my year of adventures.



Sent in and received back another university assignment. Had my misgivings but it went okay. It will be weird to be at the end of my studies when I complete this year's paper.  I've been enjoying the Diploma of Children's literature so much (except when an assignment is due and I want to throw things and set fire to my hair and run around the room screaming). It's been a terrific insight and taught me so much. I am still not sick of learning yet but will have to take responsibility for it myself in future. The world is such an interesting place.



2 comments:

Cath Foreman said...

Thanks Melinda for these links and for talking about something that has been plaguing me more than usual lately - self doubt. I guess it is just an occupational hazard for creative people!

I am very guarded about things that I'm working on, especially in the early stages. I always feel as though even a slightly negative remark will trample my creativity into the ground and halt all progress. My particular pet hate is someone standing behind me while I write or draw! Or the question, "What are you working on?" A fair question, but the answer should be, "About a dozen different things, all or none of which may amount to anything!"

But on the bright side, we are in a profession where you get a lot of undue praise for just doing something you enjoy. I know nurses and teachers don't get complimented on how clever they are as much as I do!

Jane Bloomfield said...

That's very true Cath, if I hadn't received so much encouragement/praise, I would have given up writing a long time ago. Nevertheless, in the eyes of family, friends and the general public, writers are only ever rated on what they publish. AND Melinda you are having a stellar year - milk it kid!